I had a BAD day....

Have Twins or Having Twins?

If you have multiples, be assured that everyone will have an opinion, it is as if having more than one child at a time makes you an exhibit and the rest of the world are Smithsonian visitors. During your pregnancy you feel like handing out copies of that hilarious rant that brought tears to my eyes– However believe me it DOES NOT end there.

The mere mention of twins seems to bring on a swell of “my second cousins’ sisters friend” had twins conversations– Please spare me. Also your double stroller will seem to be a magnet for crazies…. Unless I know you, please do not touch my children unless you would like to a “touch” of pepper spray in the face. In addition, please don’t tell me “you always wanted twins” – You don’t know that, because you don’t have a clue what it is like, also it makes me slightly uncomfortable for your three children whose hands your are currently holding – none of which are twins. Lastly, I would like to address the following phrases when used in reference to my children:

“Double Trouble” – My children are not trouble, in fact they are miracles, which is more than I can say for you and your socially ignorant self.

“Two for the Price of One” – Actually our boys are not identical, so we paid the price of two – two eggs two sperm, nothing one about it.

“You’re Outnumbered” – I am, however I am still twice their size.

“Double the Fun” – Please never refer to my children using a chewing gum slogan.

I might also add that I LOVE talking to other parents of multiples and their experiences – how they have tackled certain stages and how they would do it differently. Now with all of that said after my trip to the grocery store this afternoon, I created a t-shirt for all of us POMs out there….

Library Fun…..

Thursday is “toddler day” at our local library. As the weather has turned, so have our options for daily child-friendly entertainment. So I had a brilliant idea – What’s is more fun than listening to a person with seemingly no off-days read with such animation? Follow it up with a craft or art project and we have the perfect morning time-waster, right? Maybe if you have earplugs and are highly medicated.

We make it, honestly, to page two and my two year-olds are fighting over who gets to sit on which knee, who gets which puppet and making me, (please note - the only mother there with two children) stick out like a sore thumb! So I grab our things quickly to avoid the glares I can feel penetrating my skull. As we are making our way to the back I realize I have left a beloved sippy cup, I make a mad dash back with my boys running behind me “mommmmmmmmmmmy….” We appear to be circus at this point, I mean the real thing.

Finally, we are all calm, we pick out books and head for the stairs, just then one of my boys decides he wants to stay and “read book, read, book, READ BOOOOK” - Now, what mother refuses their child a book? Me. So I say “okay bye bye Parker” which was quickly followed by an echo of a “BYYE, BYE Par-per” coming from my other son – he is of course screaming this – As I try to persuade him to “shhhhh, and whisper” he looks right at me “shhhhhhh, whisper Mommy” then of course “BYYE, BYE Par-per” comes screeching out. I wish the floor would swallow me up. I will spare you the rest of the details, of how I managed to maneuver my way out of the library doors and pile all three of us into the car safely.

As I drive past McDonalds, I think “I should just stop and pick up Happy Meals all around” - but I don’t because I know I have the BEST leftovers waiting at home. “Hole Mole” Taco Chilli, no one can resist it not even the hooligans in the back seat.

NO! NO! NO! NO!

As you can see the title of this entry is not the commonly spoken phrase of “No, No” – Instead there are four.

I had just curled into bed, conveniently waking my husband up just enough to get the nightly “ugh” and shoulder roll when I heard it. Those four words from our twins’ room. Was he having a nightmare, was he dreaming of someone trying to take him? I had watched an episode of 20/20 an hour before, so I immediately assumed it was the latter. I jumped out of bed, a million thoughts running through my mind. How was I going to comfort him, how would he know I was there, should I wake him? All of these thoughts in the 10 foot walk to their door. When I opened the door expecting to see this terrified little face, there he was, lying there, eyes closed - grimacing in a familiar way. Of course! He was probably recalling the 35 times his brother had torn his favorite dump truck from his clenched hands that afternoon.

As parents nothing is more terrifying than the thought of our child being hurt or scared. I went back to bed, thinking of my little guy’s first nightmare, or at least the first I knew about, it will not be the last I know – but still, as I walked back to our bedroom, I was already planning the “comfort” breakfast I would make him in the morning. “Piece of Cake” French Toast Sticks, with maple syrup for dipping of course.